I have some homework for you. I know, I know — it’s summer, not homework time. BUT I think you should take a crack at this one, which has been on my mind for a while. Whether you write it down or just think about it (but I encourage you to write it down, blog it out, do whatever you need to), please give this some thought.

Define:

1. Happy — What does the happiest version of you look like? What are you doing in terms of career? What are your relationships like? How do you spend your downtime? Do you workout or exercise? Are you active? What do you eat? Who do you spend your time with? What don’t you do? What does your body look like?
2. Healthy — What does the healthiest version of you look like? What are you doing in terms of career? What are your relationships like? How do you spend your downtime? Do you workout or exercise? Are you active? What do you eat? Who do you spend your time with? What don’t you do? What does your body look like?
3. Now, just like high school, it’s time for some compare and contrast action. What’s different about your two visions? Do you look different? Do you use your body differently?
4. If your visions are different, how can you merge the two? What are you attached to in terms of happiness that doesn’t serve you in terms of health? What about vice versa?

Example: you think healthy means eating absolutely perfectly and being a hardcore exerciser–weighing your protein, running 5 miles every day, etc. but you see the happy you eating bon bons and playing volleyball on the beach. Hi, time to meet in the middle. Healthy people who love chocolate eat chocolate. Happy people who like running run. It matters what you actually want, not what you think you SHOULD want or what you think is externally defined as healthy…

Even though I think I’m pretty good at putting my thoughts into words, I’m having issues here. But I have all these random realizations coming to me, so here come some random thoughts:

WARNING — my filter is off

• Healthy and happy are the same thing.
• If you slog through hours of cardio in the name of losing weight, all you’re losing is that time. In my experience, it’s going to make you hungry. If you love running, run — I’m not saying don’t get your heart pumping. If you love biking, bike — you know I will be! But if you are on the elliptical right now reading this on your iPad because you want to burn calories, get off the damn thing and find something active that you like. Do Zumba. Play tennis. Dance in your underwear to old Britney Spears songs.

• If you say you could never “give up” __________ (insert food or drug of choice here), do it. For me, it’s coffee. I actually can, and I actually will. If you don’t think you “should”, maybe try it for a month. What do you have to lose? Bread. You could eat it again in 30 days, so if you wanna whine to me about not being able to have a sandwich, I’m not going to listen. This is touchy if you’re dealing with ED, I know, so tread with care and do what serves you, not what I suggest.
• If you ever catch yourself saying “I have to go run.” or “I would, but I have to go to the gym.” STOP. You don’t have to. You choose to. So either get excited about it, or don’t do it.
• We’re going to die someday. Yeah, I said it plain and straight. What is worrying you right now that’s a waste of your time and energy knowing that? I can remember seriously spending hours going back and forth over whether or not I could eat a granola bar. I should have eaten 10 just to prove to myself that I’d still be alive. And then I should have went and done something fun.
• Froyo is a food group.
• You’re probably not going to the olympics. So chill.
• If you don’t have the energy to do your laundry or get off your couch, you need to rethink things. More sleep? Do it. Less training? Do something that leaves you energized. Better eating? There’s a good reason to eat more fruits and veggies.
• The people who matter will stay in your life even when things get crazy busy. It takes 2 seconds to pick up the phone and call someone. And if you call someone, I think that shows you care. Wanna show you care? Call me, don’t text. I am in a phase where I really want to throw my phone at the wall. I think technology is ruining us.
• You can let loose. I repeat, you can let loose. I spent most of my university years restricting–heavily–in terms of food and I hardly drank because I was so worried about a beer belly spontaneously appearing on my body. Hi, I’ve been going for more beers and froyos than ever before, but somehow I’m loving my body, stabilizing at what I honestly think is my healthy weight (evidenced by aunt flo’s visits, my clear headspace, and just feeling better in general), and if I’m fat and no one’s telling me, it’s that fat and happy bliss. FYI I know I’m not fat. I think I saw abs the other day. I don’t care. It’s all a side effect now.
• I am not satisfied with my hip situation. I spent over 1000$ on this injury. Physio and massage and all that good stuff over and over and over again. And no answer, no diagnosis, no advice on what to do (except strengthen my weak glutes). Why are my glutes weak? Do I train improperly? Why do I always have a nagging injury? Why am I always working out through an injury, despite something that’s telling me to slow down? Why can’t I find a balance and what do I need to do to get off this hamster wheel? <–this is a big one.

• I don’t want to be skinny. I really, really don’t. I want to be me. I know there are thin people out there who are naturally lanky, and that’s their body type. I will NOT bash on them, as I know how hard it is to accept your body for what it is meant to be. But I know what my body is meant to be, and lanky is far from it. And I am embracing it with all it’s quirks.  It is what it is, and the more I do what I want to do, the more I realize I end up looking how I’m supposed to. What if we all gave up working out to perfect our bodies and took that time to move how we want to. You wanna play squash? Do it.
• I’m happy. So I think by definition I’m healthy, and I think it’s time for me to stop ranting since I’m halfway through a beer and we all know I only have half a liver…

Do your homework. Send it to my inbox. What’s happy, what’s healthy, what’s not fitting, what’d you realize. cheril67@hotmail.com I’ll post it on here. Whether you’re a blogger and you want me to link to your blog or you want to be totally anonymous, I want to start a little discussion here…