Goal for today: get back on track.
Progress so far: check.
I rolled out of bed in time for swim, feeling a bit icky from last night’s binge.
Swim was pretty easy, and that’s alright. A challenge for me, forcing me not to “feel lazy” or to push harder as a way to punish myself or “make up” for last night, something I know would start a cycle I am not willing to go back into right now.
By the time I was ready for the day, I was hungry hungry!
My phone died so you’re getting a dose of cleavage (ha, I wish) with breakie shot of my overnight oats with cocoa, soy milk, yogurt, coconut, chocolate chips, and a banana.
The ladies at my coffee stop offered a shortbread sample and I couldn’t say no today…
After working at the Gazette this morning, I had a dietitian appointment. My stomach was killing me and I was feeling so emotional about last night but the appointment helped. She reassured me that I did everything right but asked me how I could stop it in the future and ensured me that this doesn’t have to mean relapse and that I don’t have to let this get me down or affect me negatively. That’s what I needed. We also talked about my anxieties over how differently I’m eating (even though it’s healthy, it’s different and that is a challenge) and about what the real anxieties I should be focused on are: school, life, etc. are the stuff that I need to realize matter, not that I am eating less meat. Those are what are overwhelming, not my urges to eat chocolate. Also she reminded me that I should honour my hunger today and not get into that pattern of restriction.
So I took some medicine for my tummy, which is still angry. Note to self: bingeing makes you feel like crap emotionally and physically. It’s really not worth it. At all.
I had an apple when my stomach started growling and when I got home—all I wanted to do today was lay down—I eventually got hungry for lunch.
I made a tuna salad (with sun dried tomatoes, onions, and light mayo) bagel. It was just right with alfalfa sprouts and a bit of cheddar cheese melted on the bagel.
The last bit I’ve been working away on one of the assignments that’s due tomorrow morning. The kicker’s this: I left my mac charger at the Gazette office and really don’t want to go back and get it right now because I’m off campus. So I can grab it tomorrow morning and rely on the battery reserve. It’ll be good for me cuz a break from it all and some forced productivity probably isn’t a bad thing. NTM, I can read everyone’s blogs and check my Facebook and twitter (essential things, folks) from my phone/iPad. Oh spoiled brat much, huh? I just have to save enough to print this stuff to hand in!
With that, I’ll leave you guys! Tonight I had plans to go to yoga and to fro yo. Last night, I binged. The two aren’t related. Tonight, I’m going to yoga and out for my friend’s birthday fro yo.
Back on track.
How do you shake off a slip?